Scott Lax

 

"Nothing happens unless first a dream." - Carl Sandburg

When my son Finn, who turned two weeks old today (Happy Birthday, Finn), was about 12 weeks in-utero, I began buying him books and reading to him. So maybe his nervous system wasn't quite developed...it soothed his papa, anyway.

I kept reading to him throughout Lydia's pregnancy. The first three books I bought him were "Baby Bathtime," "Baby Night-Night," and "Baby Baa-Baa." I should have them memorized, but alas, I'm not good at memorizing. So I just read them to him.

Tonight I read them again, now that he's been in the world for two weeks. He looked me in the eye and seemed - or so I like to tell myself - interested. Not that he can understand the words, or the pictures, but he does hear the same voice that he's heard for a long time. I used to read to him when he was very active inside Lydia, and she said he seemed to settle down and, in her words, "listen."

Tonight, it seemed, he listened again. For me, for his papa, it was a deeply satisfying experience.

Earlier tonight, I picked up a library book I ordered for my future step-son, who is, at 12, an avid reader. What better way to connect to your children? Nothing can replace it. With all due respect to e-readers, turning the pages of the biography of the book I picked up at the library, or turning and reading the chunky, colorful pages of the "Baby" books... it just doesn't get any better than this. Read More 

“Happy is the son whose faith in his mother remains unchallenged.”
- Louisa May Alcott (1832-1888)

(My new column, "Finn in the World," is posted on THE FATHER LIFE: The Men's Magazine for Dad's Web site. click to the left.)

I tell students over and over and over (to quote Pee-Wee Herman) again to "use the active voice."

For example, regarding the picture to the right, you could either say, "The day Finn first rolled over on his side will always be remembered by me." It's stronger to say, "I will always remember the day Finn first rolled over on his side."

As Strunk and White say, though, "This rule does not, of course, mean that the writer should entirely discard the passive voice, which is frequently convenient and sometimes necessary."

In other words, don't fret about never using it. Or: It is not always the best way to say a thing. (The first sentence in this paragraph is active; the second passive; both work.) Learn the rule, and use your best judgement.  Read More 

"We are cups, constantly and quietly being filled. The trick is, knowing how to tip ourselves over and let the beautiful stuff out." - Ray Bradbury

That's why I'm writing about Finn.

...But do set your love.

Today is the first week anniversary of our son's birth. This isn't a food blog (to be sure) but we had soup and good bread, though Finn had his own menu. Finn did join us for dinner. This is him in his little chair - it was his first meal around the dinning room table. (And ours in a while.)

I think he was very comfortable, even if he doesn't quite reach the table yet.

Which brings me to Cicero on first efforts in writing: "The beginnings of all things are small."

If you're writing a novel or anything else and feel intimidated, write one sentence. That's what I did - I wrote the last sentence. Then I wrote the first, on the advice of a friend, and I considered my novel nearly finished. I simply took a few years to fill it in.

As for Finn, he's seemed to enjoy the family meal in his own drowsy way.  Read More 

When I became a professional writer, the first book I bought was one that contained the speeches and writings of the man whose words and deeds had such a large effect on my life, Dr. Martin Luther King. For Finn and children everywhere, Dr. King said:

"I have a dream that my four little children will one day live in a nation where they will not be judged by the color of their skin, but by the content of their character."
Martin Luther King, Jr.  Read More 

I've been writing in between being with Finn and his mommy, as well as his loving brother and sister.

Finn is my first child, as you might guess from the title of my column, "First-Time Father at Fifty-Eight." As I've mentioned, it would be easy for me to say this experience is far beyond words; yet that, as I've told my students, is not acceptable for a writer to say. So I'll keep trying to put this experience into words, and they'll be posted again soon.

Meanwhile, here's a photo of Finn on his fifth day in the world, dressed up and awaiting a visit from his cousins. (To see an interview with Finn's cousin Tyler, click Tyler's image on my home page.) Read More 

The Father Life (click to the left) will be posting my new column about Finn's birth in the next few days.